I met up with a fellow mum yesterday. She was a friend from my University days, actually she is Hubby’s friend but I’m stealing her.
This term is the best term to sum up my Sidekick. She’s attached to me 24/7 nearly. We’re even back to having to have her sit on my knee whilst I pee. I’m sorry if that’s too much information for you, but that’s my life at the moment.
So a Velcro baby, what do I mean. It’s pretty straight forward, it’s a baby, child, that doesn’t like being put down in any sense. They crave and need for their own happiness constant contact.
It’s funny isn’t it that by suddenly shifting a thought or approaching something a different way things come into your life to help you with this.
Yeah I know I sound vague or a bit ‘oooo aliens’.
I think the sleep deprivation is getting to me.
I re-read my last few posts, it made me feel crappy. I feel as if I do not appreciate my bundle of awesomeness that is Sidekick and that is the last thing I want.
Hubby and I tried for a long time to get pregnant, we were investigating adoption convinced that a biological baby wasn’t going to happen for us. Then it happened and Sidekick is here and she is my world and yet I complain because she doesn’t fit the ‘this is what your baby should be doing’ plan.
So I’m going to stop.
Being a mum is lonely or at least it is at times. Am I alone in feeling this?
Don’t get me wrong I have people around me, Hubby, my mum but I still feel lonely. Maybe it’s because I left having a child until I was a bit older (although still just in my thirties), maybe it’s because I had a career, I managed a team and now it’s a good day if I get a brush through my hair.
I love Sidekick and I adore being with her, my days are filled with laughter and fun, but it’s still lonely at times.
We all feel this right? Am I the only one who still feels that she is doing something wrong as a mother?
Sidekick will be coming up to six months old soon (I can’t believe it!) and yet I weekly still feel that somehow I still haven’t got it right. That somehow my mothering is wrong.
Maybe it’s because I’m beyond tired, teething and rolling in the sleep and getting stuck on tummy is not fun.
It’s a funny thing time, the passing of. I struggled to learn to tell the time when I was little, even now if I have to figure out something time related I need to see a clock face. It moves differently as well, super slow in those long, pointless meetings or super fast; your wedding day, your holiday, your baby.